International Adoption Resource
To Help You Communicate With Your Child

An international adoption resource to help parents effectively communicate with their newly adopted children was the goal of one adoptive mom when she created Russian for Adoptive Parents and Chinese for Adoptive Parents. These programs teach parents comfort phrases in their children's native languages.

mom and child

Bobbie Steve came up with the idea through her own difficult experience with her first international adoption from Ukraine in 2001. The Steves originally planned on adopting a baby, but instead ended up adopting a little girl who was four and a half.

While in Ukraine, the process had taken far longer than the Steves had anticipated, so Bobbie's husband had to return to the United States. Bobbie stayed with her new daughter in the Ukraine until the adoption could be finalized.

When Bobbie traveled with a translator to the orphanage to pick up Katie, her new daughter, the little girl was quickly dressed and ushered out to their cab. Soon after pulling away from the orphanage, the little girl began crying. The little girl had only ridden in a cab before to go to the doctor, and she was frightened.

"I can only imagine what she was thinking," Bobbie would say later.

Later, when they were alone at the hotel, Katie continued crying and would not stop. Bobbie held the little girl and rocked her, but she was at a loss at how to comfort her. Eventually, Bobbie resorted to the only Russian words she knew: puzhalsta - please and spasiba - thank you. "I finally began singing to her just those two Russian words. Essentially singing 'Please...Please...Thank you'. As silly as that was, it quieted her, and her crying stopped."

Helpful International Adoption Resource

You can learn more about the international adoption resource, Russian for Adoptive Parents, as well as the international adoption resource, Chinese for the Adoptive Parents by clicking here.

"It was something familiar from the unfamiliar stranger that was holding her. Of course she would settle down to sleep and as soon as she would wake up again, I would have to start rocking her and singing that silly song."

When the translator returned the next day, Bobbie asked her how to say comfort phrases. She wrote them down phonetically and began saying them to Katie. "Things like how smart she was, how pretty she was, how silly she was, and my favorite Russian word of all - 'Pots-a-louie', which means 'Kisses'".

What Bobbie realizes now is her daughter was grieving over the loss of everything familiar to her. That experience is what inspired her to develop this international adoption resource. For these children, hearing words in their own language can be a comfort, whether the child is eleven months or four years old.

When they returned home, Bobbie began trying to find a way to learn to speak more phrases in Russian. She made a point of learning new phrases before bringing her son home. Eventually she found a native speaker to help her.

When she and her husband decided to adopt a child from China, she felt led to create the international adoption resource, Chinese for Adoptive Parents. Then she created Russian for Adoptive Parents, an international adoption resource for parents adopting children from Russia and the Ukraine. Her mission is to help other parents be able to communicate with their children in their native languages to avoid the suffering her daughter went through.

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